Independence Day

What exactly does that mean in this year, 2017?

We have spent 240 years, give or take, celebrating our freedoms and independence. We have praised the United States of America for bringing democracy and liberty to more than just our people but to the masses as well. We have sang the words of Francis Scott Key, waved the fabric of Betsy Ross and marched to John Philip Sousa all the while being proud of the example that America sets for the world. 

This year, though, begs a true look back. 

Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. 

But for who?

We murdered Native Americans in our quest for our own liberties and freedoms. 

We prospered only with the help of a people who we enslaved and whose ownership we took.

Women were, at best, second-class citizens who were denied so many of the right's their male counterparts enjoyed and considered unalienable. 

We used the idea of God under Manifest Destiny to take what wasn't ours and have been punishing the people we stole from ever since.

Civil rights in this country have not been something given to all of its citizens.

Segregation was supported and people fought to continue it.

Same sex marriages only recently became legal. 

We use cultural caricatures as cartoonish mascots for our sports teams and openly support racism that we call tradition.

Women have still not been given their right to equal pay.

We have begun to hunt down people like prey if we believe they don't belong here and handle them like wild animals loose on our property.

Every year on a holiday we call Thanksgiving we ultimately celebrate our attempt at the genocide of an entire people.

We have a continual debate in this country over half of the population's right to control their own bodies. 

And our police forces are brutally murdering our people because of race. They are shooting first and asking questions never. They are not being held accountable to any reasonable standard and when our nation speaks up, they are silenced. Juries acquit killers with a badge. Citizens choose to stand with the murdering police over their innocent neighbors. 

We have been on a path since 1776 that was always heading towards Donald Trump. We have lived an existence in this country that can only be described as hypocritical. 

Not all of us. 

But it's time to acknowledge our compliance in behavior not fitting with the values we touted as forever being "ours".

It's time to change our future by acknowledging our past.

And it's time to realize and really come to terms with the fact that our past is a lot like our present and if we want to stop this degenerative process and pull ourselves out of the weeds and muck and shit that we find ourselves in, we must #resist. 

For resisting is the only authentically American thing to do. And it's our only option if we want to have actually earned the pride that we burst with in this country.

Taking Patriotism Back!

I am done with you whiny little bitches. I am done with the idea that conservatives or Republicans have a fucking monopoly on patriotism. I'm fucking taking patriotism back!

You know who isn't a US patriot? Someone who flies the Confederate flag. The Civil War was over 150 years ago and you lost. Let me just write that again because I get the feeling that you fragile fucking snowflakes haven't really accepted this yet. You LOST. Your flag is not our flag. Your leaders are not our leaders. Your statues are not our statues and your monuments are not our fucking monuments. You cower behind the idea that keeping these things is important to our history as a country and that's simply not true. This glorified memorabilia of yours doesn't remember history, it praises the losing side. It praises the things that this country chose to let go of, and rightly so. We have plenty of things in this country that properly remember the history of the time. They're called books. Maybe if you were a little more familiar with art and literature instead of believing that the cultured person's passions and vices are a weakness, you'd realize this. 

You tell liberals on a daily basis that they aren't patriots. You use the fact that they don't believe burning the flag should be illegal as your ammunition. You use the simple man's agenda to mislabel an entire group of people just so that you can steal the idea for yourself and yourself alone. 

Do you truly not understand the ideals this country was created under?

Or are you just still so upset that these ideals mean that you don't have the upper hand that you would spit on the very idea of American values? 

You claim our country is Judeo-Christian. You scream it into microphones and you write it on your Facebook page. You tout it like you fucking understand its origins. You don't. George Orwell came up with that concept (in 1939, long after our founding father's were dead). And it wasn't being used as a fucking compliment. 

You do know that we only added "under God" to the Pledge of Allegiance in 1954, right?! The founding father's had NOTHING to do with that. This is the original:

"I pledge allegiance to my Flag and the Republic for which it stands, one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

And this was written incidentally by a socialist minister (Francis Bellamy), ya dicks. 

In 1923, it became this: 

"I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

And it wasn't until our fear of communism came along in 1954 (which none of you people seem to have a problem with anymore) that Eisenhower asked congress to add the "under God" section. 

This country was founded on freedom. It was founded on liberty and justice for fucking ALL motherfuckers. 

Now, that doesn't mean that we haven't had some fairly huge missteps. That doesn't mean that we've always lived these morals the way that we should have. We've made major mistakes. But you trying to make those mistakes our actual value system is hateful, deplorable and embarrassingly ignorant. 

You tell liberals and progressives and that if they don't like this country, they can go ahead and leave it but it seems to me that you're the ones who don't like this country. You're the ones who are trying to change the country to fit your values. You're the ones trying to put your beliefs into the fabric of a country that's already been woven. 

You've added God to our Pledge. You've added God to our money. You've made your religion the backbone of your political arguments. And all the while freedom of religion and separation of church and state is fucking fundamental to the foundation of our country. 

The building blocks of this country are what we and the rest of the world view as true freedom. The ideals of the founding fathers are what we think of when we think of liberty and justice for all. 

The goal of our country should be to continually get closer and closer to those ideals and to use these ideals as a basis for how we respond to our environment. And you, the self-proclaimed patriot, have done absolutely nothing to honor these ideas. The only amendment you seem to care about is the one that gives you guns. 

You're blatantly selfish.

You're paralyzingly ignorant.

You're inexcusably greedy.

You're blindingly hate-filled.

And you're just plain wrong. 

You shout about fucking patriotism while you fly flags that are the polar opposite of patriotic. You holler until your voice is hoarse about a liberal or progressive agenda being unAmerican while you throw temper tantrums over the removal of your monuments and statues that celebrate unAmerican values.

Do you even understand what it means to be a true American? Can you even comprehend the real values that built this country?

You want to make America great again by abandoning American values, you stupid, stupid fuck. 

We're done listening to the white noise of a people (yes, pun very much intended) who can't even begin to understand the irony of their backwards, contradictory ideas. You think there's any pride to be taken in being a fucking fool? You think there's merit in being willfully ignorant and stubbornly stupid? You think that's American?

Cause it's not.

America is about freedom. America is about freedom and liberty and fucking justice. America is about equality and giving a finger to authority figures who try to take all of these things away from us. 

And that includes the police. A true American believes that just because someone wears a uniform and a badge doesn't mean that they get to modify our ideals to their liking. It doesn't mean they get to shoot first and ask questions later. That is NOT their job. Their job is, quite plainly, to SERVE and PROTECT all people, not just themselves. And if they don't like that, they don't have to do that job. Sure, Blue Lives Matter but not any more than any other fucking life in this country and making it seem like they are is decidedly unAmerican. 

Freedom for all. Justice for everyone. Liberty for the masses. And equality for all our people indiscriminately. THAT is America.

And if you don't like it...if you can't be the patriot that our country deserves...YOU, you confederate flag waving, Jim Crow-loving motherfucker, can get the fuck out.

New America

Everyday I watch as my country turns into Nazi Germany.

Say that I'm exaggerating. Say that I'm taking my dislike and distrust of Donald Trump to new heights. Say that I'm employing scary tactics.

None of that surprises me. And none of it stops my thoughts, either.

Why?

Because the same thoughts and feelings were told to those people in Nazi Germany that were watching in horror as Hitler took hold and destroyed their country.

Many would say that Germany still hasn't recovered from it.

Because no matter the state of things inside that now-unified country, the rest of the world still uses them as the ultimate warning. We still use them as an example for the absolute worst that can come out of the world. We still vilify them. We still recoil from their history. And we still have trust issues.

And now this is where we, in the US, are.

The country that has this as their Preamble to the Constitution...

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

...is now the country that has done all of this in the FIRST week of Trump's presidency.

• Lied about the size of his inaugural crowd...for days...as if that was important and deserved this time and concentration.
• Put in the executive order to repealed the Affordable Care Act without any alternative for the millions of Americans that will be without health insurance. 
• Put down the Women's March and dismissed the voices being heard there.
• Reinstated the Global Gag order for scientists and the EPA, trying to silence the voice of truth and keep educated people from sharing their knowledge.
• Issued an executive order to allow the construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline through the Standing Rock Reservation.
• Began funneling federal resources to build a wall on the border with Mexico. Not only is he instituting his isolationist agenda but the wall is now being paid for by American tax payer money and his only plan for getting the money back is to tax Mexican imports, that would essentially still mean the American taxpayers would be funding the wall. 
• During his first televised interview, said that he supported torture and believed in its effectiveness. This includes being specific about being pro-waterboarding.
• He also said in this interview that Chicago was worse than Afghanistan. That people were being killed right and left. And that if Chicago didn't do something about it, he'd "send in the Feds".
• In this same interview where he stated that Chicago was worse than Afghanistan, he also said that no place was worse than the Middle East. He said that people were being beheaded all the time there. Christians and even Muslims, all kinds of people, were having their heads chopped off all the time.
• Declared that Sanctuary Cities would not be tolerated, prompting Miami to be the first to fall to Trump's demands and instruct its police force to not protect illegal immigrants. 
• Declared war on the media.
• Threatened to publish a paper listing the names of illegal immigrants and the crimes they have "committed", taking an actual page out of the Nazi instruction manual. 
• Sent his VP to the March for Life, the first sitting VP to attend, and continuing to push the sentiment that this is a Pro-Life presidency.
• Continues to obsess over his incorrect belief that he won the popular vote (that he lost by over 3 million people) and insists that this voter fraud is due to illegal immigrants voting. Will continue to spend the government's time and resources research this, despite the fact that it doesn't matter. 
• Ban refuges and issuing visas to people from several Muslim-majority nations. 

And this is not a complete list. This is just the overview. 

This list is our country now. This is the New America.

Unless we stop it.

Our New Normal

Everyday when we wake up in Trump's America, there's something new and horrifying to behold. It's overwhelming. I'm sure it's meant to be.

Scientists are on lock-down.

The EPA isn't allowed to speak.

The Wall is beginning.

The Affordable Care Act is being repealed without an alternative.

Medicare and Medicaid are under attack.

A group of men met inside a woman's uterus to ban insurance use for procedures she might desperately need.

We're being bombarded.

Trump is advertising his hotel in DC.

His staff have private RNC emails and he tweets from on unsecured Android phone.

Paul Ryan declared this to be a pro-life congress, essentially throwing it's unconstitutionality in our faces and ignoring the health of more than half of the country's population.

Nothing that's happening right now is okay. Our country and it's people are being drowned as our rights and freedoms are taken away. If you don't see this as a war on the truth, you're not looking hard enough. Facts are becoming illegal. Truth is becoming a felony. And soon we, the people, will be the detainees in Gitmo. We will be shut out from reality and the rest of the world. We will be isolated and vulnerable, attacked by our own government and being weakened by a life without educational nutrition. Our public schools are in imminent danger and that's exactly as they'd like it.

The dumber we are, the more they'll get ahead. The more ignorant we are, the more power they'll gain. And the more passive we are, the more we will become a country of hate and evil: a country at war with its purpose.

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, must move forward without hypocrisy and hold our government and our country responsible for the tenants that we are supposed to hold dear.

My Apology

This blog is just for me. It's not about anybody else. These are my feelings about myself and I need to own them.

I need to apologize.

I need to apologize to all my human brothers and sisters for letting you down.

I just turned 41.

I wasn't blind. I wasn't unaware. I didn't think Donald Trump would win but I also knew it'd be a close race.

I knew what our country was like.

And I failed you.

I failed us.

It was like I was hoping that if I behaved like everyone was equal then that would be reality. Well, I guess what I really meant was then that would be my reality, emphasis on the "my".

I'm planning on going to the Women's March on Portland the day after the inauguration. It will be my first march but it shouldn't be.

I should've been marching for years.

I may have been voicing my opinions all my life but I should've been speaking louder. I should've been using a megaphone or a microphone or the writing skills that God gave me. I spent a long time making things up to go on the page and I still love that. But, my own thoughts and my own words and my own reality should've accompanied it. My own hopes for our universe. My own hopes for our country.

I've been selfish.

I've written about what's most interested me.

Mostly fiction. Mostly funny. A little smut.

But years without anything meaningful.

I've tried to give people a means of escape and that has real merit. But I needed to do more than that.

I needed to try and help make the world something that people needed to escape from a little less.

I've always believed that was my purpose but I stopped looking for it at some point and started just thinking of myself.

I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry that I was so selfish for so long. I'm so sorry that I lived in a world that was so one-sided and I didn't really do anything to stop it.

I'm so ashamed.

Every time I write a blog or work on my book or write something down about how we can't live like this anymore, I can feel my stomach roll a little and know that my nausea is my own shame.

I can't imagine being on the other side of privilege and not being at least a little pissed that it took so many people so long so say something. And that gives me shame as well.

I wonder if I've hurt my friends that aren't white with my silence. And I know if I have, it's totally justified.

And I apologize. I wish I could apologize everyday for my silence. I've thought of you as my friends. I've cared so much for you. And I've let you down. Not because I'm so powerful that I alone can change the world but because it's the right thing to do and I haven't been doing it.

I can't let this shame stop me now, though. It may make me feel like a partial hypocrite for taking so long to do the right thing but I'd rather do the right thing now even if it means I feel like shit about my past inactivity than only feeling better because I'm ignoring my own truth.

It's officially after midnight, so I can say:

Today is a new day.

Today, I am a new me.

Today and going forward, I pledge to be the me that uses her voice for change. I pledge to be the me that is brave enough to speak up for what she believes is right. I pledge to be someone I'm really proud of and I pledge to have higher standards for what makes me proud.

Eulogy

The United States of America is officially dying. As 2016 comes to a close, our country struggles to take its lasts breaths. We say goodbye to a beloved President and First Family, the first African-American First Family and are forced to shake hands with the person who questioned our leader's birth certificate for 8 years. We not only rewarded the man who demanded proof of a man's American citizenship because of the color of his skin but we gave the completely unqualified monster his job.

We're exiting a time of prosperity and health and being asked to be led by a man who didn't win the popular vote, very much like we did at the beginning of this century. And whether we realize it or not, many of us are getting flashbacks to a time when our solution to terrorist attacks was to wage wars against the wrong enemy. The only difference is that where many of us thought that George W. Bush was the wrong choice, we didn't desperately fear what his presidency would bring. We didn't cry for the careless disregard that was being given to our constitution. We didn't tremble over the numerous similarities between our new leader and the leader of the Third Reich.

Each day that goes by, the man who lost the popular vote by over two and a half million (and counting) people pieces together his cabinet with person after person who is hoping to dismantle the beauty of our country. The country that takes care of its people through the education of its youth is faced with a woman who wants the quality of your children's education to be determined by your salary. The new head of the Environmental Protection Agency is the person least interested in protecting the environment. If this man had stock in bubble wrap, he'd tell you that our best bet for keeping our planet safe would be to paper the whole fucking place with that shit. And then he'd remind us how fun it is to pop it just so we'd have to buy more and redo the wrapping job. Our new labor secretary, a fast food CEO, isn't all that fond of labor and prides himself on his ability to sell the ultimate American dream: a busty blonde in a bikini eating a cheeseburger. The list goes on and each choice is worse than the one it follows.

Our President-Elect has been lying about jobs he saved, taking credit for jobs he has nothing to do with, has given the go-ahead to a potential tech monopoly, has gone on countless Twitter rants and embarrassing SNL rages that are the stuff of maniacal dictators and is currently holding a self-congratulatory Thank You Tour.

The United States is dying.

You know what, though? Maybe this is for the best. Maybe The United States of America, as it was, does need to come to an end. This nation was started under some thoroughly wonderful ideology and a finely crafted constitution and even before we put it into place, we were violating it.

How can you build a country of equality on the bones of the people whose land you stole to do so? How can the foundation of a truly equal nation stay strong when it's built by the work of slaves? And how can a flag stand for liberty and justice for all when it was sewn by a woman whose gender still isn't as "all" as another?

There are so many things that The United States got right. There is so much for us to be proud of. And yet, to tell the full truth, we have to admit that we're a country that has hypocrisy woven into our fibers. We pledge freedoms and still limit people's control of their own bodies. We promise justice when we regularly blame victims and absolve authority without a second glance. And we make caricatures of real people and then claim they're our tradition.

Maybe there was no way to build the country we wanted using the methods we employed before. Maybe there was no way to fix the mistakes we made when more people weren't joining in the fight. We can't just fight for our own rights, we have to fight for the rights of all.

I can't just care about the rights of white women just because I am one. I have to care about the rights of all people, of all genders, of all identities. I have to join hands with people who don't look like me or sound like me or love like me and pledge to fight just as hard for their rights as I do my own. If I don't, then not only do I not deserve the rewards but I haven't actually worked for them.

Maybe this will be our Rebirth of a Nation. Maybe this was our only way to survive. Maybe this is how we save our country, instead of how we lose it

Hypocrisy -- The Blue State Comedy Tour

This not something that should need an entire blog post to address but it seems that there is a rather large portion of the American people that need a lesson in what does and does not make a person a hypocrite.

And in an effort to reach out to those particular people, I felt like it was important to use the format and cadence of a powerful ambassador for their people.

1. IF the presidential candidate you voted for is the same person who spent all EIGHT years of Barack Obama's presidency questioning his place of birth and demanding over and over again to see his birth certificate and now you're telling those upset over this same person becoming the President-Elect of The United States of America (PEOTUS) that they need to show their loyalty and support for this man based solely on his new government position...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

2. IF you swore up and down that a "yuge" reason you voted for Donald J. Trump for President of the United States was because he was going to "drain the swamp" of all the corrupt lobbyists and executives from corporate America that have worked their way into our government and then you're okay with every single one of his covered-in the-swampy-muck choices...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

3. IF you stated over and over again that the choices for president need to be less focused on all of their personal interests and more focused on bettering America and then you get pissy because everyone is upset that Trump is not setting up a blind trust and instead mixing and matching family members between his transition team and his executive board...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

4. IF you wailed over the amount of money Hillary Clinton took for giving speeches to Goldman Sachs and you don't have a fucking problem with Donald Trump continuing to be an executive producer on The Celebrity Apprentice...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

5. IF you bitched and moaned over the American government costing the American people money and you aren't fucking irate over the fact that the American government is now going to be paying Trump money so that the Secret Service can live in Trump Tower because Melanea and Baron aren't moving to The White House...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

6. IF you've been one of those people that have thrown the word elitist around every time Hillary Clinton was mentioned and now you have nothing to fucking say about the fact that Donald Trump doesn't think that the fucking White House is a good enough home base for himself and his family...YOU might be a motherfucking HYPOCRITE.

7. IF you say that you believe in equality and freedom for all citizens and you used your vote to allow a person using racist, sexist and bigoted language to become the President-Elect of The United States of America...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

AND...

8. IF you call yourself a patriot, an American patriot, and you don't have a problem with Russia meddling in our election...YOU might be a HYPOCRITE.

Understanding

You keep telling me to understand. To be quiet. To let it go.

You call me a crybaby, a whiner, a troublemaker, a child.

You say I'm a hypocrite. You say I'm spewing the hate I rally against. You call my pain a temper tantrum.

You tell me it's my job to unite us as you call me a loser.

Well, to you I say, if you want us to unite please make me understand. Please explain to me how any political issue you have is more important than human rights.

Please teach me how whatever it is that you deem so important is worth me or someone else sacrificing their basic human rights in exchange.

Please give me your take on how equal rights has varying definitions for varying groups of people. Please help me to understand why it's okay for you to move onto the specifics of designing your perfect "pursuit of happiness" while some of us are still struggling to get their rightful amount of "life" and "liberty".

There are some things you need to understand.

Whatever you say, however you treat me, no matter what you do -- I will always be your equal. You can never change that. That's not up to you to decide. The same rights that you were born with, I was too.

If you're allowed to live where you want, so am I.

If you're allowed to marry who you want, so am I.

If you're allowed to tell people they can't touch you, so can I.

If you're allowed to be comfortable in your own skin, so I am.

If the police aren't allowed to harass you for no valid reason, they aren't allowed to harass me either.

If you're allowed to walk down the street without being yelled at, poked at, shoved, sworn at, grabbed at or shot at -- so am I.

If you're allowed to apply for a job, so am I.

If you're allowed access to necessary medicine, so am I.

If you're not blamed when someone commits a crime against you, I shouldn't be either.

If you're allowed to practice whatever faith speaks to you, so can I.

If you're allowed to receive any and all life-saving procedures, so am I.

If you want to eat at a certain coffee shop, use a certain bakery or hire a certain photographer, I'm allowed to hire them too.

And if you and I are virtual carbon copies of each other in the workforce except for our sex organs or skin color or any other such quality and you're earning a certain amount of money, I better be making the fucking same amount of money for my same amount of hours, effort, brain power and loyalty.

These are areas we don't seem to agree on. You seem to think that these are areas up for debate. They aren't. You and I must share a planet. I'm okay with that. I'm even okay with us sharing a country, state or town. There's just one ground rule and as long as that rule is followed, our differences of opinion can be fairly easily worked with.

The rule?

You and I are equals. And we will be treated as such.

End of rule.

End of discussion.

End of patience.

The Win is in The Fight

I am an artist, first and foremost. I have known since the beginning of my memories that I was born to write. That has always been my identity. That has always been how I've seen myself.

I glory in that. I wear it like a badge of honor. I have a gift. A real gift. I sit. I put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard and words just seem to appear. I see myself go through the entire process but in some very real ways, it feels magical. I don't map things out. I don't make writing a science. I don't sketch before I draw my words.

I have no qualms with those who do. It's just not me.

I love my gift. I cherish it. It makes me proud.

But there are conditions to the type of gift I have.

I know, deep down in my soul, that it is my duty to live the life of an artist. It is in the very fibers of my being that I use my voice and my art to try and make the world a better place.

I like writing fiction a lot. I like writing everything a lot, to be honest. But more so than that, it is my privilege to turn letters into text into ideas. It is my honor to help speak the important thoughts and beliefs that will hold our planet and its people together.

My soul signed a contract before I was given this gift and I feel that pact in the way I move, the way I think, the way I love. My voice will never be silenced. I have made sure that is impossible. And my voice will be used to promote freedom, equality and love.

IDGAF

Hey, Everybody! Welcome to my new blog...I Don't Give a Fuck. It's a blog where I tell you things...that I don't give a fuck about.

Come, let's take a journey together.

I don't give a fuck...if people who spent the last 8 YEARS talking about Obama's birth certificate are saying I'm acting like a child because I'm upset by the recent election results.

I, for real, very seriously do 👏🏻not 👏🏻give 👏🏻a 👏🏻fuck 👏🏻about 👏🏻this👏🏻.

And let's learn why, shall we?

Because if you're one of those people that fucking bitched for eight fucking years about this American man's birth certificate (and we all know why) and now, one day after the election, you start telling me that I'm whining if I'm upset by the election results...well...that makes you what is called a "hypocrite". AND I do not give a fuck about a hypocrite's opinion of me and my behavior.

Go ahead and talk until you're blue in the face. Call me a whiny child. Laugh at me and say it's because I called Trump a bully and now I'm being one too. Please feel free to go ahead and do all of that and do it with flourish and gusto, if you like.

And let's learn why, shall we?

Because if you don't know the difference between bullying people and crying out that once and for all you will not let people bully you and your fellow humans then I don't think that you're very smart. And if you're not smart enough to understand how someone who commits sexual assault (just picking one example, please feel free to swap out with any number of unacceptable issues) and then brags about it is different from someone saying they will never be okay with someone who commits sexual assault and brags as their President then I, for sure, don't trust your judgement on anything, let alone me. And if I don't think that you're smart enough to judge me then I don't give a fuck what you say about me.

And once and for all, let's learn why, shall we?

Because apparently, I'm too complex for you to understand. Apparently the concept of fundamental human rights is too fucking complex for you to understand. Apparently you think that whatever issue you have, whatever people you're afraid of, whatever part of the government you deem unsuitable, whatever glitch in the matrix you think needs fixing is more important than every human's basic civil rights. And if that's too complex for you, I don't have the capacity to dumb down my brain in order to communicate my people's thoughts and concepts to you.

And sweethearts, if I can't do that then I don't give a fuck to waste my time being upset over anything you say or any way you may criticize my words or actions.

Our Chance

The message of this blog is specifically written to any person who was at one time a kid like me. 

A kid who sat in social studies, learning about World War II and was shocked, dumbfounded, and horrified at the things she discovered that day. A kid who never thought that history could ever slap her in the face so hard. Mind you, like a lot of American text books, mine went into greater detail about The Holocaust than it did slavery or the slaughter of the Native Americans, so the face slapping didn't cease when the bombs were dropped. 

For any people out there that were like me in this way, I certainly hope that you're planning on voting for Hillary Clinton this November. 

Because in all honesty, to vote for anyone else -- whether it's Trump or someone who's vote would be tantamount to gifting Trump your vote (Stein, Johnson, writing in Bernie -- I'm looking at you here, Susan Sarandon) -- you would be answering "me" to the question that each one of us had when we learned about Hitler and World War II. 

Who could possibly let this happen?

You'd be answering "yes" to the question that baffled us all:

Can good people really allow a horror show like this take place?

You'd be answering "this is how" to the question that warped all our little minds:

How could people who aren't evil ever even consider following someone who so clearly is consumed with hate and violence?

Please, take me seriously when I say -- it is our time now. You can pretend that I'm exaggerating or being overly dramatic but do us all a favor and reconsider. We are Germany in the 30s. We are those people. We are the people saying "how bad could it really get". We are the ones that decide what happens to our neighbors. Hitler did not decide. Trump does not decide. We decide. We are the ones that throw that rock through a storefront. We are the ones that throw a bomb in a masque or a Southern Church. We are the ones. We are the ones that decide if ours is a country where "land of the free and home of the brave" really means something or if they're just words to a song with some really sketchy stanzas. 

Will we allow all people to be free? 

Will we be brave enough to make the right decisions? 

Will we?

Will we allow ourselves to be duped by some two-bit hate monger and fear peddled? 

This is our time. 

This is our fight.

This is our future. 

You are not better than someone else just because of the color of your skin. You're not better than someone else because of your gender or identity. You're not better than someone else because of the name you give to the god you pray to. And you're not better than someone else because of the person that you love. You're just not. 

Those are very simple sentences and very simple ideas. They're not complicated and they're pretty damn straightforward. These are the base fundamental elements that are supposed to unite our country and honestly, decent people everywhere. You shouldn't be considered arrogant to expect these things for yourself; you shouldn't be considered brave for demanding these things for all people; and you shouldn't be considered virtuous for taking exception to any of them.

And whatever beef you have with Hillary Clinton -- be it real or imagined -- is NOTHING compared to what you would be voting for if you chad up anyone else's name on your ballot in November. You may think that you'd be taking a stand for whatever ideal it is you've latched onto but just understand that your ideal is NOT more important than people's civil rights and understand that civil rights is exactly what we're talking about here. 

This is our time.

This is our fight.

This is our future.

This is our chance.

Don't disappoint the kid you once were. This will be so much bigger than not becoming an astronaut or a rock star. There's no coming back from this. In more ways than one.

Questions

Normally, I like to think that I have all the answers. Although I certainly haven't fooled myself into thinking I'm an astronaut or rocket scientist, I do like to think that I know stuff. I do well at Jeopardy. My educated guesses are pretty right on. I tend to figure out who the killer is pretty early in movies or tv shows. And I pick up things fairly quickly, in general. Basically, I'm awesome. 

But, this isn't that kind of blog post. 

Cause there are just some things that I don't understand. 

Like, superficial judgement. Whether it has do to with your race or gender or physical appearance, whatever. I don't get superficial judgement. I don't understand how just by looking at me, you think you know me. Skinny and fat shaming fall into this category. Thinking people with tattoos are somehow less responsible would fit into this one too. I mean, I just mentioned that I think I'm smart and yet I can promise you that those things don't help me determine what you're like. How the fuck do I know what you're like until I actually talk to you?

And another one. Religion. Judging people on their religion, I just don't understand. I mean, fuck off. If you know anything about the major religions we've got going on, you know that they're pretty similar in the things they preach. Sure, the stories they use are different but the morals tend to be very close to one another. So, why aren't religious people just happy that there are other religious people out there? Why aren't they happy that so many other people share their thoughts on how to live their life while they're here? Why isn't being a person of faith something that draws those people together instead of dividing them so significantly so often? 

And along those same lines, why is it that people are so intent on mixing religion and government? The same people that are constantly talking about how the second amendment is woven in gold and shouldn't have any limits of any kind have no problem disregarding freedom of religion and separation of church and state. How can you claim that one amendment is more important than another like that? And if you start reminding me that there isn't much ahead of the right to bear arms in the constitution, I'll remind you that freedom of religion is one of those that is. So given that, why does anyone think it's okay to force their religion on anyone else? I don't care how good you think yours is, faith and religion are very personal things and to tell anyone that you should be in charge of how they show their faith and choose to worship is criminal and a personal violation. 

Nextly (Yes, I know that's not a word, so what), why is it so fucking hard for some people to put themselves in someone else's shoes? Do we really need to have experienced something in order to be able to determine whether something is shitty or not? How is it that so many people can willfully ignore real problems and issues just because it isn't affecting them directly? How does it not cause them actual pain to see others in pain? How is this not a thing that everyone deals with? 

Also, why is it the initial reaction of so many to blame the victim? Is the idea of a broken system or fallen hero so horrifying to you that you would chose to stick your head in the sand, or worse, blame the injured party just in order to sleep better at night? And why isn't blaming the victim keeping you awake? Why does ignoring a real problem put some at ease instead of fighting for what's right? I understand that ignorance is bliss but what about an outright refusal to admit what you have to know deep down? Is that bliss as well? 

And are there really that many people out there that actually think that their race is a superior race? Cause sometimes it really seems like there are still a lot of people out there like that. Is that just a magnification of the terrible the way that tends to happen with the media or is that still a significant percentage of people? And for those people who truly believe this, how is that even possible? How can anyone actually think that one race is better than another? How can pigmentation mean so fucking much? 

And to that same end, are there also really people out there that think one gender is better than another? Do some feminists really believe women are better than men? Do other people really think that the majority of feminists have this warped view? Do some men really believe that they deserve to earn more for the same level of work? And are there really both men and women who think that the man should be the head of the household and the woman be subservient? And I don't mean just having traditional roles, I mean actually thinking that the man is the boss of the woman, as if husband replaces father and woman stays a child. 

Here's another: do most people really believe that their country is better than every other country and the people in it? Do most Americans really believe that they're better than other people from other places? And not your standard, respectful patriotism but the actual belief that being American means being better? And is the state of our country today not giving you pause in this belief system?

Question: are there really people out there that think that we can make life better for anyone through hate? Are there really people who don't view hate as a disease that needs to be eradicated? Are there really people left in this world who don't realize that hate destroys the soul, poisons the heart and decays the brain?

And with that same thought in mind, how does hurting other people not make some people feel terrible inside? How does causing pain in others not make some people wither inside? How can you cause tears in another and not feel a part of you die inside? And how does it seem like some people thrive on this feeling? How can it be that some people get energy from the destruction they cause in others? I was a dick to a guy in the drive-thru of an Arby's in Los Angeles about five to seven years ago and I still haven't been able to let it go. I was wrong and I was a dick and my friend told me so and I still feel bad. How is it that there are some people who don't work this way? 

And finally, how is it that for some people a stranger's own personal experiences and life choices are so deeply offensive? This one really fucks me up -- I just don't get it. I just don't understand. And if there's someone out there that this is true for, please, I beg you -- educate me. How is someone else's life experience -- someone that you don't know, someone who has no bearing on your life -- how do their actions and how does their life, in general, become so violently offensive to you? Why do you feel it's your place to watch them, judge them and then attempt to eviscerate them from afar just because you disagree with the way they classify themselves or the way feel they have to live their life in order to be true to themselves? And you know exactly what I'm talking about here, not serial killing, not theft or torture -- but choosing to become a more whole person, from their own perspective. How do you feel it's your place to take a very real and very painful situation and try to crush the person struggling with their own identity?

So these are just some of the questions I have. These are some of the things I've been struggling with, both lately and for a lot of my life. And sometimes it just gets tiring to try and try and try to come up with answers when it seems like so many people don't have any desire to actually come up with solutions. So, instead I wanted to share my questions and struggles with you, knowing that there are other people out there that have the same things going around in their minds. Maybe together we can work some things out.